Watch movies with black people at your own risk. “Takers” officially released on Friday to the public and The Black Man took it all in a theatre filled with chocolate people. The experience, as always resonates the random, but it was undeniably genuine. Get the realest review of the latest hot movie to hit theatres.
Dear Urban Black Moviegoers:
You are now forgiven. I had once harbored a resonating resentment towards some of you the way sensitive sisters can’t get over their cheating ex. Last year, I was watching Precious, and you really pissed me off. I was justifiably jaded on how such an astoundingly sensitive story was ruined by the innapropriate actions of chocolate theatre.
I’ve learned there are just some movies you don’t watch in an urban setting.
Delightfully, the action packing “Takers,” starring the Essence-sponsored, black women’s crush crew of guys like Michael Ealy and Idris Elba fits the mold of a movie you need to see in an urban theatre. Not only should you watch this movie before it hits DVD, you should head to the city and make sure black people are going in.
Yeah, I said it.
Don’t expect Oscar winning screenplay or thoughtful templates of on-screen art. Spike Lee was not present for such a purely meatheaded movie dressed with GQ flavor and concrete garnishing. So it was no surpise to me that the movie – in my opinion - started off slower than a bad business. There was more cliche than climatic; corny one liners and unrealistic scenarios that my part-time bourgoise posture had to adjust to. It’s hard to take a movie seriously when five so-called smooth criminals are pimp-walking away from a crime scene in slow motion as a helicopter blows up…. nine feet away. I mean… come on.
But then again, we are talking about movies for black people here. Sometiems, I’m astounded at how easy we can be. Some of us act as if we’ve never, ever, ever seen anything blow up on the big screen. We oooooh and aaaahhh at the old Hollyowood tricks. We laugh at the corniest jokes. Sometimes, I think they are the reason Tyler Perry refuses to hire a proof reader.
On the other hand, I’m glad they were there. If Takers were a Little League team, the audience were the overcompensating parents, cheering on even the smallest of scenes. I then realized, as the movie continued to turn, that in essence, this movie was playing a shoe-in home game. The crowd was behind it, and somehow the movie performed better behind the cheers and claps. It was a victory in every sense.
What’s more telling are African-American’s we-don’t-care-what-you-think-about-us sponsored bias that lingered in the air like barbeque smoke. The reactions to some scenes were reeking with homerism so deep, that it was almost racist. It reached its height during Chris Brown’s unbelievably outstanding, incredibly amazing, fantastically fantastic getaway scene, complete with total acrobatic challenges that would make Jackie Chan break a sweat. A clear criminal in the film, he’s dodging a police officer as he runs through traffic, getting hit by like, 19 cars and jumping out of about 13 buildings. Each time he temporarily gets away, the crowd literally stood up and clapped and cheered. Again, CB is playing the criminal. Finally, in a highly dramatic moment, he actually murders the cop and gets away… much to delight of the audience.
“YEAH!!!!”
“WHOOOO GO BOY!”
“RUN!”
Yeah, he shot the cop, and the crowd goes wild.
I couldn’t help but laugh at everyone’s joyous delight as I attempted to hide my own inner Chappelle.
By the time we’re an hour in, we’re submerged in salacious shootout after bullet-riddling shootout; black folk are on the edge of their seats as if a fight is about to break. I’m glad there were no 3-D glasses.
The movie plays out to incredible distances, getting louder, more action-packed and more dramatic as it builds up. Suddenly, this isn’t the black version of “The Italian Job.” This is the second coming of “Set it Off.”
Takers… for all of its imperfections is a certified hood classic that serves up an edible movie experience. Watch in an urban theatre though, it needs the hot sauce. The audience will bring the bottle.
THE COLOR CURVE RECOMMENDS:
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
“Hood” classic? Yes. Simply because “sistas” are LOVING the cast! I loved seeing a movie with the finest MEN (all races) in Hollywood; it seemed like this film was an action/heist film made FOR women. I loved it!
Ok. I thought YOU were calling it a hood classic. Now I see you’re saying the HOOD is labeleing it a classic. On that one I agree. I saw it opening weekend with a mostly black audience and while they didn’t cheer and clap at every moment they did seem to like Chris Brown’s getaway. No claps, but they were into it and also at the end there were claps. My dates (2 females) liked it WAAY more than I did, but I did like it. Hood classic? NO WAY.